As a child, I used to play this game with my sister and her friend that involved closing your eyes and allowing the other players to come up with the weirdest combination of foods that they could find in the refrigerator, which you would then have to blindly taste test. I’m not sure what kind of strange, masochistic spirit had taken us over at the time, but I look back on those memories fondly despite nearly puking from eating things like peanut butter, mustard, and anchovies all in one bite.
I recently discovered that my sister, her friend, and I are not the only people out there sick and twisted enough to try to make the most disgusting food combinations imaginable, there is an entire community of people out on Reddit who pride themselves on finding food combinations that will make you never want to eat again. The phenomenon is called “cursed food” and it’s seriously messed up in the best way possible.
Before we dive into some of the best cursed foods that I’ve found online, let’s do a little thought experiment. Try to imagine the grossest combination of foods or beverages that you can. Think of two or three things that should absolutely never be eaten together under any circumstances. Got it? Alright, let’s see if your nausea-inducing masochist meal is grosser than the culinary travesties you’re about to see.
Ham and Cocoa Puffs Sandwich
Who doesn’t like a nice ham sandwich? I had a delicious ham sandwich the other day with some swiss cheese and mustard, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. You know what I’d never think to do? Add a sugary and chocolatey breakfast cereal like Cocoa Puffs in the mix. Apparently, Reddit user u/Minime104 thought it would be a good idea.
What’s that strange white substance over the top, you ask? Oh, that right there would be milk. Yes, they decided to drench the entire thing in milk, as if it wasn’t already repulsive enough. Was this person going to eat a ham sandwich and a bowl of Cocoa Puffs for lunch and then just decided to combine the two for efficiency’s sake? The world may never know.
Milk and Oreos With Cheetos Dust
Here we have another offering from Reddit user u/Minime104 who I’m now learning is the G.O.A.T. of the cursed food game. Not all geniuses are great at math or science, and I would argue that thinking to mix the cheese packet from a box of Cheetos Flamin’ Hot Mac ‘n Cheese into milk and then proceeding to dip an Oreo cookie into it is the work of a deranged genius mind. Hats off to you, you unhinged maniac.
Now, if you really get down to the science of it, milk and cheese are both dairy products. And I assume a lot of people put milk into their Cheetos Flamin’ Hot Mac ‘n Cheese. So is this really that gross? Yes, yes, it absolutely is. The color of the milk. The Oreo covered in the cheese-that’s-not-really-cheese. Everything about this is so wrong, but we love it anyway.
Pepto-Bismol Hot Dog
Here’s a philosophical question for you. If you eat a gas station hot dog (which is guaranteed to absolutely ravage your stomach), but it’s covered in Pepto-Bismol (which is meant to make your stomach feel better), do the effects of the two cancel each other out? Will your stomach just stay in the same state it was in before you ate the Pepto-Bismol-covered hot dog? These are questions that no one should attempt to answer.
This fabulous creation comes to us from the wild mind of Reddit user u/regian24, and if there’s a government watch list for this kind of thing, they should definitely be on it. The unnaturally pink coloration of Pepto-Bismol alone has always made me gag a little, and seeing it lathered on a hot dog certainly doesn’t help. Still, there’s definitely some points to be given for creativity here.
Steak, Bananas, and Ketchup
From the bottom of my heart, I hope that Reddit user u/False_Relativity just got a little willy-nilly with the squirt bottle and put that ketchup on that banana by accident. Allow me to just make a basic rule of thumb here. Ketchup and fruit should never go together. I don’t care that a tomato is technically a fruit and that ketchup is made from tomatoes. It’s just wrong. My cousin used to put ketchup on his fruit when he was a kid and I still hold a grudge against my aunt for not punishing him for it.
But let’s forget that the ketchup is even there for a second. This lunatic is about to enjoy a plate of steak and bananas with a glass of milk on the side. Everything about that has me cringing down to my core. And unlike the other cursed foods on this list, I feel like this person actually ate that. I would personally send this person a fruit basket from Edible Arrangements out of sympathy, but I’m pretty sure they’d just smother the whole thing in ketchup.
Hard Boiled Egg Jello Shots
What’s the problem with normal jello shots? You can’t eat the little plastic ramekins that jello shots usually come in. Now that problem has been solved. Introducing hard-boiled egg jello shots from Reddit user u/thegirlwithtwoeyes, the best way to get all that protein you need from egg whites while also getting totally turnt with your homies on spring break. Someone call up the Nobel Committee because this type of ingenuity has yet to be seen in the modern era.
In all seriousness, the fact that hard boiled eggs and jello have sort of the same consistency is where the synergies end. The overly sweet and slightly alcoholic taste of a jello shot mixed with the sulfuric taste of a hard boiled egg? No thank you. I recently went to a bar where they served pickled eggs as a chaser for whiskey shots, and I felt like that was kind of nasty, but this is just a whole new level.
Swiss Miss and Kraft Switch-Up
Here we go again. I’m starting to think that giving people packets of powder that they’re meant to mix into their food is too much responsibility for us to handle. On the right side, you have what I assume is hot milk mixed with Kraft Macaroni & Cheese powder, which I would imagine being slightly more tolerable than drinking a hot cup of Cheese Whiz. On the left side, you have a bowl of macaroni noodles covered in Swiss Miss Hot Chocolate mix, which might just ruin the flavor of chocolate for you forever.
This classic switch-up comes courtesy of Reddit user u/KnownOperation, who I imagine did this for comedic value. However, a part of me hopes that they switched up the packets completely by accident, realized that they’d just made cheesy milk and chocolatey macaroni, and then decided to eat it anyway. Hey, sometimes you just have to take what the universe gives you.
If I see one more person defiling an Oreo, I may have to call up Nabisco and beg them to do something about it. This is something that should’ve never happened; however, it seems like Reddit user u/junior040308 is quite proud of their creation considering the photography here looks nothing less than professional. Look at the exposure, the lighting, the focus. It’s all perfect… except for the fact that there’s a shrimp in the middle of that Oreo.
I found it pretty strange that they have seafood-flavored candy and sweets in certain parts of Asia, but I don’t think anyone’s mouth is watering over a shrimp-filled Oreo cookie, even with the impressive display of photography skills.