Recently, as I was clicking through the various streaming platforms that I probably shouldn’t be paying for, I stumbled upon an old friend on Hulu. Workaholics was a staple of my television diet through my high school and college years, and the show probably influenced the way I behaved during that period of my life (a little more than I’d like to admit).
However, as production of Workaholics came to a halt over half of a decade ago, the show fell off my radar for quite a while. But, upon rediscovering this masterpiece of a series, I proceeded to binge-watch the entirety of all seven seasons. And I’m here to report back to you with what I believe to be the 6 best episodes of all time.
If you’re unfamiliar with Workaholics, all you need to know about the show is right there in the name. It’s a blending of the words “work” and “alcoholics” as the show follows three mid-20s degenerate males that live in a pigsty of a home and spend every moment that they aren’t at work drinking copious amounts of Heisler (a fictional beer brand). From there, anything is possible in this show.
Of the many hijinks pulled off by the crew, a few moments stand out amongst the crowd. So, let’s take a look back at the 6 best episodes of Workaholics that you need to rewatch.
1. Brociopath
The sixth episode of the fourth season, “Brociopath” is a warning about what happens when you allow toxic frat culture to go completely unchecked. The lads meet a character by the name of Stan Halen (because his real name sucks) when they invite a bunch of frat dudes to an after-party at their house. As Anders, Blake, and Adam strive to impress Stan Halen in hopes of being inducted into Kappa Zeta Nu (a.k.a. “The Zoo”), they endure some vicious hazing.
Things are relatively benign, though, until Stan flips a switch and goes all bro-ciopath on them. He tries to get them to put vodka-soaked tampons in inappropriate places. He tries to brand them with an iron against their will. The guys are forced to peer pressure Stan into drinking some toxic liquid, which sends him to the hospital.
2. Fry Guys
If you’re not super familiar with Workaholics, you may not be aware that our trio of stars has a sexual fascination with their boss Alice, a woman who they drive to the brink of insanity on a daily yet who refuses to fire them for some inexplicable reason. Anyway, the second episode of the fourth season (titled “Fry Guys”) is the only episode where Alice actually agrees to hook up with one of the guys (under the persuasion of a large quantity of hard liquor).
The episode begins when Blake finds that all of the koi fish he put in their chlorinated pool had died. To honor his dead friends (who all have punny names and are referred to collectively as the “koi boys”), they decide to have a fish fry at the office. However, when Alice shoots down their idea, they set out to make her happy so that she’ll sign off on the fish fry. Of course, they determine that the only way to raise their boss’s spirits is to get her laid.
3. True Dromance
The second episode of the third season of Workaholics is what can only be described as a love letter to marijuana. And this episode deals with a question that most stoners have asked themselves: “How am I going to eat all this food if I’m not stoned?” In the “True Dromane” episode, the three amigos aren’t able to reach their pot dealer Karl because his dog ate his phone. And, as luck would have it, this misfortune occurs just before the annual Humonga Cucamonga pizza-eating challenge at their local pizza joint.
From there, things get out of hand. The guys get tied up with a new drug dealer named Lisa. Then, because they paid $250 per hour to hang out with Lori Beth Denberg from the iconic ‘90s show All That, they’re unable to pay Lisa her due. Lisa then involves her scary boss Cortez, who turns out to be Karl in disguise. Karl starts talking about getting out of drug dealing and going to college. The whole episode is one big hilarious mess that, ultimately ends with all of the guys getting extremely high on a park bench.
4. Webcam Girl
The fifteenth episode of the third season, called “Webcam Girl”, also touches on a feeling that most people have experienced at one point or another: the sadness that comes with being alone on Valentine’s Day. Luckily, the gang finds a creative solution to this problem. All three of them fall head-over-heels in love with a webcam girl. Day and night, they pay an exorbitant amount of money to keep her in a private session while they profess their love for her. They only have one rule between them: no cranking down.
Things take a turn when Anders maxes out his credit card and the guys formulate a plan to rescue their webcam girl (known as “JustAnna”) from the studio where she’s being held captive. As it turns out, JustAnna is working at the studio entirely of her own volition. And, after meeting her in person and discovering that she’s a “real chick” with real thoughts and desires, the guys are no longer interested in their webcam girl.
5. Ders Comes in Handy
While doing some innocent shopping, Ders runs into a woman in the supermarket and, unexpectedly, the two of them start getting frisky right there in the aisle. Ders is brought to completion just by a little rubbing on the front of the pants, hence why the ninth episode of the third season is titled “Ders Comes in Handy”. However, Ders goes home satisfied with the encounter until he discovers that the mystery woman in the supermarket was the wife of his coworker Montez.
When Montez becomes suspicious that his wife is sleeping around on him, he enlists Adam, Blake, and Anders to follow her and find out who the guy is. Anders knows full well that he’s the guy they’re looking for but Blake and Adam have no idea, so Anders decides to blame the whole thing on their drug dealer Karl. Eventually, after an epic duel between Karl and Montez, the truth comes out about Ders and Montez’s wife. However, in a strange twist, Montez doesn’t care because he made an agreement with his wife that anything over-the-pants was alright.
6. Teenage Mutant Ninja Roommates
As a fan of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, I absolutely adore the seventh episode of the second season of Workaholics, titled “Teenage Mutant Ninja Roommates”. The episode starts out with the guys getting invited to an office party Montez’s beautiful house, which they discover that he bought with a pay bump he got from TelAmeriCorp. And, when their boss Alice gets hammered after two years of sobriety, she agrees to give the guys the same pay raise if they just show up to the office early the next day.
The guys accidentally crash into someone’s garage on the way home and take to the sewers to avoid the local security guard. While in the sewers each of them takes on the persona of one of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. After a long and disgusting journey, they finally make it to the office on time only to find out that Alice is no longer giving them the raise. Their odyssey through the sewers was all for naught.